Vacation at home

Most parents don’t look forward to vacationing at home during the summer months. The excitement of going to some place new cannot equal a vacation at home. However, in times of financial uncertainty where planning a holiday is next to impossible, a little novelty goes a long way.
Most of us gather a lot of information about holiday destinations but know very little about our own cities. Summer activities for children in the cities get better and hotter than the summer itself with each passing year. This maybe the best time to hone your child’s talents and interests. The key word with children is novelty to keep boredom at bay. The only thing children lack these days is time and attention from their parents. This is critical in building the most cherished childhood memories. My most cherished memories are the ones I spent going to the beach with my parents, listening to the animated ghost stories of my grandmother and stealing mangoes from my neighbour’s tree with my friends. In times where finding a mango tree in our concrete jungles or friends for that matter is next to impossible, parents have to do most of the monkeying around. Getting to know picnic spots is a good way of getting your couch potato, PSP kid out in the open. A fun way of reliving your childhood is to do those things you did as a child with your child. Find a good tree to climb and teach your kid the pro way. Teach him to “deal” his kite or make the biggest splash in a shallow stream. This could be the fastest way of going from “Zero” to “Hero” in your child’s eyes.
What about the things you can actually do at home? Play a board game as a family or a game of shuttle. This helps in making your child a team player. Skip the boring, standard menus at least once a week and cook along with your child. Children love to be the handy man/woman at home. Invite his or her friends for a sleepover and try making your own tents out of bed sheets, curtains and a lot of creativity. Have a puppet show or arrange for a magic show at home and watch your child become the most popular kid on the block. Create an art and craft corner for your child at home and give Van Gogh a run for his money! A reading corner filled with fairytales, detective stories, illustrated classics and a mini food cupboard ensures quiet time is exactly that.
These are just a few fun ways to fill the summer days. Finding what works best for your child lies in how well you know your child and in the efforts taken to sincerely plan a good fun, filled holiday season for them. Gifting your child an abundance of good memories is the best reward of parenthood. Going the whole hog should not be difficult when the price is a bear hug and a kiss that says, “You are the best”.

Teenager - Friend or Foe?

It’s weird how we feel about growing up. We look back at everything we did in childhood and through our teen years with great fondness. However, we don’t like to see our children growing up. We love those years when they had chubby cheeks and even the ones when their smile was filled with gaps. We definitely don’t like the years where every question is answered with a mumble beneath the breath or the ones when missed calls start happening, a little too often.
A child’s intellect and emotional balance grow with each passing year. Undeniably it’s the parent who leads the child through its first steps, first school, first fight and first love. During the transition between childhood and adulthood, we find the child finding it increasingly difficult to verbalize or display emotions. This is because the child becomes increasingly aware of the world and other relationships outside the family that can be very compelling sometimes.
What are the mistakes parents do with a teenager at home? Most teens don’t like elaborate display of affection by the parent or grandparent in the midst of peers or outside the home. A parent should not take offence when a child suggests toning down these overtures. It simply means, “Please treat me with the dignity of a comrade and a friend. The baby that was in diapers is not me anymore.” Trust also goes a long way. Certain privileges could be allowed. If your teenager wants a mobile to keep in touch with you, it would be better to analyze the situation with the child to see if it really warrants it. If not a little cash can be provided to help them make calls in an emergency. Not wanting to know every teeny bit of detail about their day or friends assures them of your complete trust in the freedom you have given them. This creates a sense of responsibility to do the thing that is morally correct. It’s important to step back but how does one reprimand without rubbing it in? Staying objective and tackling only the issue without throwing accusations at the personality or friends of the child helps get the point across. Leading by example is important. Actions speak loudest when there is a teen watching your every move. A lecture on not acquiring bad habits will never work. As adults we have to be able to show them self control and discipline in our own selves. Principles and morals are picked up only from home. A pat on the back goes a long way. Praising them for their plus points and helping them figure out their weaknesses is important. Negative criticism could bring about terrible rebellion. Honing a hobby or a skill from childhood also helps drive boredom away. Every teenager wants to try something new everyday. Most young adults pick up a habit forming addiction simply out of boredom. Keeping the novelty going on a daily basis is hard work for any parent especially those who work 24/7.
If we look back at pictures of ourselves from our teen years, we would all find a certain glow on our faces. That comes from having a lot of joie de vivre. We all have pressures at every stage in our lives. As children it could be the pressures of learning something before our friends do. As young adults it’s a lot of peer pressure, study pressure and parent pressure. However, it’s only as adults that we lose the skip in our step and the smile in our eyes. Living life lightly at any age is the key to being your child’s friend through the transition years. Floating is something we teach by letting go and letting them live their dreams.
Being available for your child is not a choice anymore. It is imperative that parents stop instructing and start listening to what their child actually wants to express. This world becomes a better place everyday when there is someone who really cares!!

Rainy days and your child!!

My son doesn’t take well to rainy days. Most children below the age of five, find the monsoon season extremely boring. Parents pose restrictions on kicking in puddles and getting wet. However, playing indoors need not boil down to watching TV.
Here are a few games to play with your child and his/her friends when the rain plays spoil sport.

1. Puppet show - Take a big cardboard box and make a dupatta curtain in the centre. Open out the flaps in order to put puppets through the back and use front flaps as windows. The child’s dolls, toys like cars, spoons, etc. can be used and a story can be spun with imagination.

2. Hide the loot – Give your child ten items and tell them to hide one item in a bag. Guess the item hidden by asking your child to describe what he/she hid.

3. Photo fun – Make a photo collage of your child’s favorite pictures from your recent vacation on a chart paper and add comment stickers or emoticons in appropriate places. Hang in your child’s room when complete. Photo collages make great décor ideas too!!

4. Colour splash – Paint a picture using old toothbrushes, bottle caps, sponge, waste wool, fingers, hands, toes and just about anything other than paint brushes. Make sure you do this on the floor and don’t get any paint onto a costly outfit or a carpet.
5. Junk art – Use material from all over the house. Cotton, old magazine pictures, buttons, sand, old shoe lace, wrapping paper and just about anything. Make a Christmas scene or a meadow and watch your child’s imagination flitter like a butterfly!!

6. Dress up – Give the age old game of robber and police a twist by dressing up yourself and your son to fit the roles. Dressing up like a character in a story is a good way of getting the child to understand the story completely. The parent can be the narrator and the child can play the central character.

7. Shadow play – For those of you who are not scared of the dark and have brave children, its time to light a candle and put on the musical night lights. Spin a story with shadow figures. The crow looking for water to drink is a beautiful tale to spin around one’s fingers.

8. Cook with mommy – This is a game that can be messy. Children love helping their grown-ups in their grown-up things. Explain that cutting and cooking on the stove/oven are grown up things to do. However the child can help wash the vegetables, add certain ingredients, beat an egg and a whole load of other things that can be fun.

9. Song and dance – Teach your child simple dance steps to his/her favorite song/rhyme. Dress him/her up like a pop/rock star and have your own Indian Idol show at home!!
10. Puzzle when it drizzles – Buy a puzzle for your child and hide it from them till the monsoon arrives. On a dull, dreary “can’t do anything else” day give them this surprise gift and watch them lose track of time.

Here’s wishing all you mom’s a happy fun filled Monsoon!!